the red pole sticks out of the water about 20′ or 7 meters. it’s located on an outer reef in okinawa. it’s not even a surf spot. 3 years ago i almost died there. this year, people might say it was revenge, but to me, it was a challenge. i never like putting the word revenge on nature because i’m sure i will lose. but to challenge myself and face my worst fear is something i wanted to overcome. this place scares me. i know how hard i hit the reef and i know exactly where i hit it. then to take off on a huge thick wave and ride over that same spot 3 years later is like a nightmare happening all over again. on my last trip to okinawa, there were 2 reasons i was there. one was for kimura-san’s birthday. the other one mother nature left it up to me to go, or not to go. i don’t think anybody on that boat that day knew what was going through my mind. honestly, i was scared, worried, and nervous. and for me, i don’t like feeling any one of those 3. while i took the long paddle to the lineup all by myself, i was telling myself, “if i die today, i die today.” and if i died that day, that was my destiny.
this was the swell 3 years ago that was published in Surf1st magazine. that’s me on the top of the wave looking down a monster. remember how tall that pole is. then look at this wave breaking over it. photo: kinsan
then here i go as kinsan shoots from the channel. i take off on a set as i hear the wave crash on the pole, i set my rail going backside and see this huge wall coming in from the channel. should i pull out or pull in? in the split second, i decide to pull into the barrel.
as i grab my rail, i see the wave suck all the water off the reef and see dry coral heads everywhere. one eye on the barrel, one eye on the reef. it’s too late to pull out as i’m committed. i decide to pull in and hope i don’t hit my fins on the reef. photo: kinsan
the wave sucks up so much that my tail comes out and i start sliding sidewards. i let go my rail to try to regain control. one eye on the reef, one eye on the wave. see that boil in front of me? it’s boiling because there is no water there. i fall face first, the wave picks me up, and slams me back head first into the dry reef. it happened in a split second and i was knocked out. somehow i woke up, the jet ski grabbed me, and i was taken back to the boat. i had the chills and went into shock. while everybody else didn’t know i got hurt and kept surfing, takahashi-san came back to the boat and pretty much saved my life that day. and i still thank him till this day. photo: kinsan
then fast forward 3 years. october 25, 2012 to be exact. i paddle out to the same spot. the waves are a little smaller but the reef is still there. i tell myself on the way out, “just let me get one wave and survive.” i ended up catching 3. i’ve overcome my worst fear. i have closure on this very spot that almost took my life. it was a personal challenge to me. photo: naoka
later that night, a friend came up to me said “hey kirby, your surfing got old. you didn’t surf good today.” that bummed me out at that time, and still bums me out till today. when people can sit back and judge me from the outside, it’s sad. that person didn’t even surf that day and had no right to put me down on one of the biggest challenging days of my life. it’s actually kind of sad the more i think about it.
anyway, what did i learn that day?
-to do anything possible in my life to overcome my fears.
-to challenge myself and be more confident.
-and never to put anybody’s surfing down. never!
i don’t like writing things like this on my blog but i just had to get it out. that day i had mixed emotions. a lot of my good friends who were with me on that boat 3 years ago know my life changed from that day. when you have a near death experience, it humbles you. i have absolutely nothing to prove to anybody anymore. i have equally fun surfing a knee high wave with my friend and pulling into a death barrel on the north shore. and since i found that part of surfing, i’m a happier guy both in and out of the water. and it might sound selfish, but that’s all that matters to me. surf for yourself, not for anybody else!
