good evening. just got back home from a mixed emotional trip. yes, traveling is fun. but when something happens to a country you love, it hits you hard. i don’t think anybody in this world knows how i was feeling. helpless? guilty? lonely? sad? all of the above. watching the news from palau was hard for me. i couldn’t stop thinking about my family and friends in japan. are they ok? where are they? i couldn’t check my email and couldn’t get through to japan as i was calling and calling. the slow internet connection in palau wasn’t helping. i’m still speechless as most of the japanese living in palau are too. emi-chan was our driver and when we came back in off the boat that evening, i could tell she was hurting. she’s from ibaraki and we were talking about it just as the tsunami hit japan. i felt so sorry for her. then our japanese neighbors at our condo were feeling it too. i could just tell by the blank look on their face watching CNN news all day and night. it was sad and lonely being so far away…. i want to say sorry to the crew i was with on this trip. i was trying to be myself, but my heart was somewhere else. the fish, the waves, and the experience didn’t matter anymore. i felt like my hometown got wiped out…

now that i have internet, i’ll probably be on it for the next week trying to find answers. so far, i didn’t loose anyone but i’m prepared for the worst news. thank you to all of you who sent me emails, texts, and messages. i just got it and i can feel the love. all we can do now is HOPE. hope for the best, hope for nothing worst, and hope for recovery.
just a message to my japanese friends. “keep your heads up, keep thinking positive, keep on striving for the best! never give up! i’m on your side and if there is anything i can do to help, please don’t hesitate to ask. my heart is with you and the beautiful country of japan!”

Glad to be back.

hello. what do i say? what do i do? what am i thinking? oh my
gosh. millions of things running through my mind while i sit here in
palau feeling helpless. we were diving in the middle of the ocean
yesterday when we got word of the earthquake in japan. we rushed as
fast as we could and as soon as i got back, i turned on the tv and
seen something i’ve never seen before. japan, the county i love so
much, pretty much devastated. my friends? family? then the tsunami
heading toward hawaii? are you kidding me? i was glued to the tv
pretty much emotionless. and pretty much feeling helpless. i wanted
to go home.
i’m still lost for information and when i go home tomorrow, i’m hoping
i won’t hear or see any more bad news that i already have. i know
that the worst has yet to come and i just pray for japan. my friends,
family, and people who were lost. what else do you say at a time like
this?
i’m speechless…..